drowning!Ophelia (completely unrelated topic)

i'm quite ready to be in love *with* someone, now. i think i've waited long enough. they all have someone. even that bitch of a sister of mine has someone, though it's not who we would've preferred. i'm not asking for long lasting love, no Extra Sugarfree Gum kind of love. just something to give me a break from the usual. from being so awfully lonely.

i want to love someone who loves me. someone who wants to talk to me and to go places together and dance..... i don't even want kisses so much. i do... but i can go without that... i think. i don't mind not having phone calls. not really. but to have someone! to have a (boy) who wants to hold me. that shy, awkward, grinning time. the holding hands and the one to call your own.

god! it makes me want to weep, sometimes! it seems they all get someone. and i'm so tired of being alone. i'm tired of being here and me and being alone.

i'm tired of being the friend and not the girlfriend. of hearing how cute some other girl is. and knowing i don't measure up. is it that hard to be in love with me? is it really so terrible?

god i'm tired of being alone! isn't there someone out there for me? please... let them know i'm here. and i've been waiting so long....