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for those of you who care what i've been up to lately.... i'm kinda 'off-grid' right now. that is, socially speaking, i'm not doing so much. not sure whether it's by choice or by force. i haven't been on Y!M, AIM, MSN, GoogleTalk, LJ, GJ, Facebook, Bebo or Ringo in any kind of regular spacing, nor have i been emailing, txting, calling, whatever like i ought to. all in all, i've been ignoring emails and calls and lurking about invisibly.
i'm not really sure why i'm acting this way, either. except that, if you're just joining, i should probably tell you that i joined LJ and was suddenly thrust into the shittiest 4 years of my life. how so?
( what's been up while i've been here )
spiritually speaking, i'm at an impasse. i want to believe. i so want to believe. but there's so much more that i want and trust is right... i don't pray anymore. i barely even believe what i'm reading or learning. when i'm away from home, everything just... feels right, somehow. as if louisville is my kryptonite. i have, if not all my faith, a version of it. oh, i can't be here anymore and expect things to go right.
so, if you're just joining our program.... i'm sorry. life's sucked so bad lately, i just don't have any motivation left to be as happy as i once was. i can't get it together.
i'm not really sure why i'm acting this way, either. except that, if you're just joining, i should probably tell you that i joined LJ and was suddenly thrust into the shittiest 4 years of my life. how so?
( what's been up while i've been here )
spiritually speaking, i'm at an impasse. i want to believe. i so want to believe. but there's so much more that i want and trust is right... i don't pray anymore. i barely even believe what i'm reading or learning. when i'm away from home, everything just... feels right, somehow. as if louisville is my kryptonite. i have, if not all my faith, a version of it. oh, i can't be here anymore and expect things to go right.
so, if you're just joining our program.... i'm sorry. life's sucked so bad lately, i just don't have any motivation left to be as happy as i once was. i can't get it together.
