lj idol, week 1, empty gestures

you hugged me.
you can deny it now, of course. but i'll remember.
try as i might to forget, i'll remember.

week two of the summer abroad and you?
you made the first move.
you broke the rules.
you extended your arms and pressed chest to chest and folded me in your embrace.
a scant second and i knew that you and me? we.
joined heart to heart in an instant.

next to you i felt dirty and unkempt
like my high school uniform
untidy wrinkled and careworn.

so sue me if i fell that hard for you.
you, with your dorky glasses.
you, with your legs like water reeds.
you and your chivalry and outdated sense of noblesse oblige to the american.
two weeks and you enveloped me.
the antidote to a stiff upper lip.

it's nearly four years since i met you.
you wrote me letters every month.
you paid for my cell phone service so that you and me. we.
talking and texting about my trip.
you spent the bitter weekend where she got married having fun with me.
all because you reached out to me.
melded limb to limb one second.

and when i say we loved each other biblically,
i mean to say that i knew you in that way that adam
upon sight of eve
declared her at last bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh

i spent almost four years waiting on you.

and yet
now
i always remember to never mention you
in conversations with friends.
As if the whisper of your name
could conjure your presence.
i try to remember to think of you
only as broken clocks herald time.

i never remember to forget you.
you hugged me.